Thursday, June 5, 2014

As some of you may know, I celebrated my birthday at the end of April, my 29th to be exact. I have to admit I was and still am a bit freaked out about turning 29. I know this is a pretty common theme amongst people but especially women, aging can be scary, especially in a society that is extremely youth based and acts as if the minute you turn 30+ your life should be about babies, kids, mini-vans with the stick family on the back, mom jeans, short mom hair-cuts, and all that other cliche stuff. I disagree with any age limits put on doing things you enjoy whatsoever and I've never had any desire to wear mom jeans while sporting a mom hairdo with a baby on each hip. Not that I judge those who do, I do judge people making decisions for their life based on what they feel they are SUPPOSE to do. It's your life and you should live it the way you want to, anyone who opposes can suck it. They can literally put it in their mouth and suck. That was graphic... I make a lot of those graphic type jokes in this place, I guess it's because I feel comfortable with you *makes creepy smirk while scooting closer to you* 

Dis be the STFU Carousel.

I'm already to the age where conversations about having children are commonly discussed and no matter how clear I make it that I don't want children that I think having children should be reserved for the best people in the best situations who are best suited for it, I end up having to jump on the carousel and repeat myself. I don't want children, ever, neither does my significant other and no, I won't reconsider it. I'm already to the age when people tell me "aren't you too old" for that and I say, fuck all that noise. You are never too old for anything although I wouldn't suggest trying to squeeze your adult sized bum on a tricycle made for a kid sized bum because kids don't take you breaking their stuff that lightly and if you get stuck all the people in the emergency room are going to laugh at you. But hey, it'd be an amusing story. 

don't try this with an adult sized bum, you will get stuck&have to call the number on the side.

I just want you to know and maybe even to remind myself that:

*You are never too old to wear what you love.
*You are never too old to enjoy bright colors.
*You are never too old for toys and bike rides, roller skating, trampolines, fake sword fights, dress up, playing in sprinklers, etc.
*You are never too old to enjoy dancing or goofing off with your friends.
*You are never too old to seek new adventures or meet new people.
*YOU ARE NEVER TOO OLD TO LIVE YOUR LIFE THE WAY YOU WANT TO. PERIOD. THE END. Anyone who tells you differently is an ass-clown.

However with my 29th birthday I have been putting more thought into doing more of the things I've always wanted to do and less of the things that I don't need to do. My biggest regrets involve spending money too frivolously. I also regret spending my time worrying about how I looked, how many dates I was getting or not getting (as I've mentioned, I was insanely boy crazy), and of receiving approval from other people. I wish I had saved more money, focused more on myself and my personal goals, and traveled everywhere I possibly could! I think the travel part is my main focus currently but we all know traveling costs money and having the money to travel means saving and being responsible and sticking to a plan - all things I'm not really good at. There are so many places I want to see, even in my own country, let alone in the rest of the world. The furthest West I've been is Texas, I need to change that! I've only had to use my passport twice (technically, once), I still don't have a single stamp in there (why you no give stamp!).

I want to see the world. I want to dance. I want to get to a place where I'm truly comfortable with myself. I want to let go of regrets, I want to let go of the past, I want to let go of the mistakes I've made, I want to move forward into 30 without feeling as if now there are a set of rules I have to follow. I've never been one to follow the rules so with my fake sword held high I WILL DO IT, I will do them all. 

That's what she said. Good night *drops mic*. 

*Picks up mic and apologizes profusely, accidentally drops mic again, random person comes over to fix the mic while shaking head*.

Did anyone else get that the title is a play on "Big Tuna" from 'The Office', no? Okay...


Courtney Erin said...

I love this and totally agree with you - the pressure put on women when they reach a certain age is just ridiculous. I'm 34 and I get it all the time. And I do want to have kids but just one and not right now and just get bloody sick of the whole conversation!

Courtney ~ Sartorial Sidelines

Laura Go said...

TRUTH on everything, woman! I know the feeling too about being pressured on having kids. I have told people so many times that I just don't want them, and that's my business-- please stop shoving it in my face!

Honeysuckelle said...

@Courtney @Laura - Yeah, it feels like it is non-stop conversation you end up having with some people, even if you're clear about your feelings on it. Just blah. All this peer pressure to get pregnant, my god :)

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