Monday, September 15, 2014
I recently was sent a “give me 10 facts about yourself” message. This never happens and so I listed some very basic facts about myself out of sheer panic (maybe not panic but close enough) but now I’ve decided to re-take the test. These are like the tales I share when I’ve been drinking but I haven’t been drinking so…. uh…

1. Once I drove to Taco Bell in a snowstorm, with 3 inches of snow on top of my car, because I really wanted chalupas. A police officer stopped me on the way back home and asked me what I was doing out in this weather and why I didn’t clear off my car, I lied and said I was sick and had to go to CVS but really I just needed a god damn chalupa. Sorry m’officer, it was an emergency…

2. Since I’m on the topic of how impulsive I am, I once ordered a huge box of custom lollipops from this ebay store. They were quite cheap because they were “defective” since some of them had melted a little bit. I hid the box under my bed and got sores in my mouth from eating so many lollipops. I still dream about the banana and sweet tea ones.

3. Once when I was about 7 years old I went into the kitchen where my dad and a few of his friends were playing cards and I walked up to who I thought was my dad sitting in a chair and hugged him from behind, turns out it was his friend and I was so embarrassed that I started bawling my eyes out.

4. Remember those round bath soap things people use to have in their bathrooms, well one time I ate one. I clearly remember walking in the bathroom and spotting the round balls and thinking “ooh, candy in the bathroom, great idea!” and then getting a mouth full of soap…. I'm still waiting for someone to get on top of that balls of bathroom candy idea. That sounds so gross... I mean actual candy, people!

5. Last night I had a dream that I won $300,000 so after jumping up and down in excitement and of course, crying, I started to plan a trip to Europe. I mean I literally dreamed about sitting at a desk, smiling like a fool, and planning a trip on Expedia (or whatever travel site). I woke up pretty sad when I didn’t see a check for $300,000 next to me.

6. I use to fall asleep in class because I was up all night in chat rooms and playing The Sims. When a guidance counselor tried to earnestly ask me what was going on in my life I just shrugged, it just seemed too lame to admit the truth.

7. I busted my lip open in elementary school after I slid on sand and slid face first into a pole. I was chasing after a boy, it was our recess activity that I pretty much continued into my early 20’s with very similar results.

8. I hate corn. Seriously, if you put that shit in my face I will bite you.

8.5 I’m a biter… I've calmed down with age but beware.

9. A teacher in high school use to constantly write on my papers “stop using the word well in your writings” and WELL, *dances* I CAN’T STOP *dance, dance, dance*

10. Once on a field trip to the Smithsonian I went up to the second floor overlooking a huge crowd of people and from above the fossils i yelled, “I love…<insert elementary school crush name here>” at the top of my lungs. My friends and I laughed about it for quite a bit.

I figured I should put at least one random picture of myself drinking a shirley temple because it kind of fits with the general randomness of this list. 

Thursday, September 4, 2014
So, oh my god, you will never guess what happened! I... slacker extraordinaire... have almost, yes, ALMOST, totally acceptable nails. Boom. Squeal. Confetti throwing. One person in a corner with a lackluster expression blowing on one of those noise maker things. I know this fact isn't exactly ground breaking but considering I've come into every post for the last year with shitastic nails, I'd say "hey, look at that" and then move on 5 seconds later. Maybe not even a full 5 seconds, why am I still talking about this... onto the post and by post I mean the only posts I ever make anymore... but before that, here is a random picture of me in a hat. Wee.

Current nails: Cast a Spell by China Glaze on the feetsies. I love this color. It reminds me of Hocus Pocus and on the topic of Hocus Pocus I might have to pop over to my xbox and put that ol' moving picture show in. When I was a little girl I wanted to be Sarah Sanderson. Hell, I still do. Anywho, I should put this color on my fingers since my mermaid nails are chipping off and flying into everything (my hair, my cats fur, my breakfast, your breakfast... oops). Please clicky on link for credit of photo of Cast a Spell. My mermaid nails are literally 5 different colors - pink sparkle, blue sparkle, purple sparkle, hot pink base, and turquoise base. I couldn't remember the names if I tried. So there ya go. A novel about my nail colors.

 Current movie: The one the only, Ho-da-cus Poc-da-us. 

Current search: The Sanderson Sisters/Hocus Pocus on etsy. Why have I never searched for this before? This movie makes me insanely happy. Next search: Hocus Pocus soundtrack on amazon. Scratch that, Hocus Pocus soundtrack on ebay. Dammit, it's expensive. 

Current outfit: It's before noon, I'm in my pajamas. More specifically Black tank top with a raven on it and pink cheetah print pajama bottoms. 

Current guilty pleasure: Have you discovered the Cookie Dough cafe yet? Because why did I never think of making this a thing, I eat raw cookie dough ALL DA TIME.

Current food/drink: See above picture. They're both happening, I'm sorry I'm not sorry. Tea and cookie dough party in my face hole. Face hole, what a sexy descriptor.

Current TV show: Boardwalk Empire and The Knick! Like I really need a new tv show to obsess over but it has happened. I will tell you one thing, the other doctors better start being nice to Dr. Edwards soon! I wish I could just give him a hug. 

Currently watching: Hocus Pocus. Der.

Current reads: Well, here are my last three reads. I recommend them all. 

Current wishlist: Eshakti Mesh Overlay Floral Dress // Hocus Pocus Soundtrack // Bizarre Blurple by China Glaze // Torrid Blue Skull Print Top // Eshakti Red Lace Florence Dress // Modcloth Cornucopia of Cute Dress // City Chic Lace Lavinia Dress // Black Cat Eye Sunglasses // Torrid Kiss Print Sweater // Eshakti Black Faux Leather Trim Coat // Simply Be Claire Richards Sequin Dress //  Modcloth Academia Ahoy Blazer 

Current mood: Awesome.

Current bane of my existence: Wanting to be a home owner. I love the house I live in but we don't own it and I want to paint and have a dog and gothify everything and I can't do that currently. One glorious day it will happen, hopefully.

Current what have I been up to: I've been having a pretty good two weeks. I saw Beetlejuice under the stars (and rain but it didn't hold me back) on a jumbo tron. I smiled like a five year old the entire time although there is no physical proof (*finger movements* excellent *creepy smile*). Yesterday I went to the Alamo Drafthouse and saw 'As Above, So Below' which was shrug worthy but I always enjoy going to the Alamo and seeing "scary" movies in the theater. 

Current for sale: This modcloth dress and much more! Visit my ebay to buy from moi. Guest appearance by the Halo who keeps trying to lick my jar of cookie dough.

Last purchases: Way too many Monster High dolls including Invisibilly and Wydowna Spider. Some blu-rays/dvds and thrift finds.

Current triumphs: Well, it's not my triumph but my little sister, Becky, just started her first year of college. She is living in the dorms and doing well. I've been worrying only a little and texting her silly crap endlessly. I'm trying to put together a care package for her, anyone have any recommendations?? I'm thinking something useful but cute.

Current Needs: Bridesmaid dress. I'm going to be a bridesmaid for the very first time, my best friend is getting married in October and I think I've found the dress but it is hard to find dresses that fit my massive bust.

Current link: BigCatDerek on Youtube

Saturday, July 19, 2014

Current guilty pleasure: BBQ. These are my plans for today: Bank, Thrifting, and BBQ. Not too bad if you ask me. The area I live in isn't exactly teeming with BBQ joints but luckily one opened up not too far from my house and although it isn't the best ever, it is still BBQ! I'm a sucker for pit beef/beef brisket.  Oh and probably hot pink lipstick, I'm wearing Pink Velvet by Limecrime in the above picture.

Current nail color: Remember how I said one of these days I'd come into one of these posts with my nails in check well... that day wasn't today. I did find a really beautiful blue nail polish at Target a bit ago. 

Current playlist: I came across this page recently and as everyone knows, I was/am totally obsessed with True Detective and the music, although not my usual, is really good! Some of my favorites include: Young Men Dead - The Black Angels // John Lee Hooker - Unfriendly Woman // Vashti Bunyan - Train Song // The Mevlins - A History of Bad Men // And Rammstein. Rammstein is quite good, I'm listening to Reise Reise in my car.

Current drink: Coke. I was trying to cut back but my craving for it has been full stop the last few days.

Current food: Beef Brisket. Blue Bunny Vanilla Ice Cream. Cheddar Chipotle Sausage. 

Current Favorite TV Show: Ray Donovan, Masters of Sex, Forensic Files (an old favorite), and Last Week Tonight with John Oliver! They're so many great TV shows on right now, it's almost hard to keep them all straight. I'm thinking of starting Parks and Rec and Breaking Bad on netflix but we'll see. I did watch a few episodes of Orange is the New Black and it's okay but I wasn't really hooked.

Current wish list: Black Cat It Again Dress //  Studio Lace Midi Skirt // Evans Black Swing Dress // Sourpuss Omni Muscle Tank // Domino Dollhouse Anatomy Dress // Asos Curve Midi Skirt in Scallop Hem Lace // New GPS // Plane Ticket so I can meet all the sweet kitties (and lemurs and llama) that live in C.A.R.E!

Current needs: My depression and anxiety have been really hard to cope with the past few months. I've been sleeping a lot and having panic attacks often and just having a hard time all around but now I'm on medication for it and things are slowly starting to get better so I'm hopeful things will turn around.

Current triumphs: I have health insurance! It is practically the first time I've had it my entire life and it feels a bit strange, lovely but strange. My Doctor is really kind and understanding and I'm really hoping that with her help I'll be on a better road. 

Current bane of my existence: My depression and anxiety. It has been really hard to find the motivation to do much of note, leaving the house has been tough. 

Current obsession: C.A.R.E/BigCatDerek on Vine/Big Cats/Arctic the Snow Leopard & Snow Leopards! It deeply pains me to know that so few snow leopards exist in the world, I mean look how gorgeous Arctic is! I'm so obsessed with him, he is practically a celebrity to me. He watches cartoons and snuffles constantly, ugh, what I wouldn't give to cuddle him (if he wasn't a "wild" animal that could bite my face off). I'm determined to visit the sanctuary sometime this year or next. Please visit their site, check out their vine/twitter/facebook and donate if you can! 

Current outfit: Green Calvin Klein cargo pants (so much comfort!), gray tank top from Forever 21 Plus. I'll put a cardigan on to leave the house but I'm waiting for my hair to dry a little more.

Current movies: Madagascar 3.  King Julien and Sonya forevers // Gremlins. How could anyone resist Gizmo // Kung Fu Panda // Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (saw it, liked it, Caesar is a badass!).

I've mostly been watching TV but my mood has been really fragile so I've been trying to stick to sweet/silly movies to keep my mood uplifted. 

Current link: Care Rescue Texas

Thursday, June 5, 2014

As some of you may know, I celebrated my birthday at the end of April, my 29th to be exact. I have to admit I was and still am a bit freaked out about turning 29. I know this is a pretty common theme amongst people but especially women, aging can be scary, especially in a society that is extremely youth based and acts as if the minute you turn 30+ your life should be about babies, kids, mini-vans with the stick family on the back, mom jeans, short mom hair-cuts, and all that other cliche stuff. I disagree with any age limits put on doing things you enjoy whatsoever and I've never had any desire to wear mom jeans while sporting a mom hairdo with a baby on each hip. Not that I judge those who do, I do judge people making decisions for their life based on what they feel they are SUPPOSE to do. It's your life and you should live it the way you want to, anyone who opposes can suck it. They can literally put it in their mouth and suck. That was graphic... I make a lot of those graphic type jokes in this place, I guess it's because I feel comfortable with you *makes creepy smirk while scooting closer to you* 

Dis be the STFU Carousel.

I'm already to the age where conversations about having children are commonly discussed and no matter how clear I make it that I don't want children that I think having children should be reserved for the best people in the best situations who are best suited for it, I end up having to jump on the carousel and repeat myself. I don't want children, ever, neither does my significant other and no, I won't reconsider it. I'm already to the age when people tell me "aren't you too old" for that and I say, fuck all that noise. You are never too old for anything although I wouldn't suggest trying to squeeze your adult sized bum on a tricycle made for a kid sized bum because kids don't take you breaking their stuff that lightly and if you get stuck all the people in the emergency room are going to laugh at you. But hey, it'd be an amusing story. 

don't try this with an adult sized bum, you will get stuck&have to call the number on the side.

I just want you to know and maybe even to remind myself that:

*You are never too old to wear what you love.
*You are never too old to enjoy bright colors.
*You are never too old for toys and bike rides, roller skating, trampolines, fake sword fights, dress up, playing in sprinklers, etc.
*You are never too old to enjoy dancing or goofing off with your friends.
*You are never too old to seek new adventures or meet new people.
*YOU ARE NEVER TOO OLD TO LIVE YOUR LIFE THE WAY YOU WANT TO. PERIOD. THE END. Anyone who tells you differently is an ass-clown.

However with my 29th birthday I have been putting more thought into doing more of the things I've always wanted to do and less of the things that I don't need to do. My biggest regrets involve spending money too frivolously. I also regret spending my time worrying about how I looked, how many dates I was getting or not getting (as I've mentioned, I was insanely boy crazy), and of receiving approval from other people. I wish I had saved more money, focused more on myself and my personal goals, and traveled everywhere I possibly could! I think the travel part is my main focus currently but we all know traveling costs money and having the money to travel means saving and being responsible and sticking to a plan - all things I'm not really good at. There are so many places I want to see, even in my own country, let alone in the rest of the world. The furthest West I've been is Texas, I need to change that! I've only had to use my passport twice (technically, once), I still don't have a single stamp in there (why you no give stamp!).

I want to see the world. I want to dance. I want to get to a place where I'm truly comfortable with myself. I want to let go of regrets, I want to let go of the past, I want to let go of the mistakes I've made, I want to move forward into 30 without feeling as if now there are a set of rules I have to follow. I've never been one to follow the rules so with my fake sword held high I WILL DO IT, I will do them all. 

That's what she said. Good night *drops mic*. 

*Picks up mic and apologizes profusely, accidentally drops mic again, random person comes over to fix the mic while shaking head*.

Did anyone else get that the title is a play on "Big Tuna" from 'The Office', no? Okay...

Saturday, May 3, 2014
Hello, hello, it has been too long (again...). Has the fire gone out in the blogging world? It seems like a lot of people are blogging less and less as of late. Is it just a phase? I certainly hope so. Anyway, onto the only posts I seem to make....

Current guilty pleasure: This is a toss up between Wegman's Cheddar Jalapeno Bread and Russell Stovers Wedding Cake/Red Velvet Eggs (that I pretty much spent my entire April consuming). Now that Easter is over my love affair with the Russell Stover Eggs is probably over but I mean can you blame me, look at that white chocolatey goodness. Seductive little strumpets those eggs are...

Current nail color: Yep, you guessed it... chipped and a mess. One of these sweet ass days I'm going to have my nail shit figured out in time for a current post but please, for the love of white chocolate eggs, do not hold your breath. I don't know what it is, I like having cute nails I just can't find the patience to maintain and paint them on a regular basis. Right now I have this clear coat that is chipped to hell and kind of resembles melted cheese, it is not exactly pretty. I'd prefer actual melted cheese on my hands, I mean at least real cheese is delicious, especially all melty.

Current playlist:  Trust. Trust. Still Trust. I'm so obsessed. Since my last entry I got to see them again in Philadelphia and they did not disappoint, I even got to sit on my fat little butt with a good view of the stage. Also a little L7, The Cramps, KMFDM, and probably others that my mind is blanking on. 

Capitol - Trust / Icabod - TrustGeryon - Trust / Four Gut - Trust / Lost Souls/ Eelings - Trust

Current drink: My usuals, Thunderbird Wine and Cheap Scotch. Actually, in shocking news, I tried Angry Orchard's Hard Cider in Crisp Apple and find it pretty tasty. I typically hate every beer/hard cider I ever try but this was pretty tasty.

Current food: Talenti Gelato Chocolate Chip with Dark Chocolate Morsels and heart sprinkles. Heart sprinkles make everything better. Okay, maybe not Sars, I doubt heart sprinkles cure Sars. Just putting that out there, I'm not a Doctor but I'm quite certain on this one. 

Current Favorite TV Show: Dark Minds. Game of Thrones. Mad Men. The Fall.

Current wish list: New Bedding // A relaxing Vacation // Sheer Dotty Tights // Eshakti's Entire Site // GPS - Mine has had it's day

Current needs: Sleep. Especially if I want to hit up the Flea Markets and Yard Sales tomorrow.

Current triumphs: Um, I've kinda learned how to use a curling iron. This might not seem like a big deal but I majorly sucked at trying to curl my hair and I can now at least do a semi-decent job. It's a semi-curled kind of life.... I also started my own ebay store and it is going pretty well, feel free to check it out >>>>>> Honeysuck_elle on Ebay <<<<<<

Current bane of my existence: See video.

Current celebrity crush: Again, see video. I <3 Peanut.

Current indulgence: I might have already mentioned that.

Current blessing: Paypal. Self-Serve kiosk at the Post Office. Hero. Halo. Monkey. 

The fact that the fox that was stalking our front yard finally decided to go yap somewhere else, they make some horrific sounding noises. Apparently it was a mating call but it sounded like something out of 'The Wire' was going on outside.

Current Tomorrows outfit: Lucky Brand Bootcut Jeans, Torrid Daisy Print Top, Black and White Striped Cardigan, Black converse, Small hoop Earrings, Black necklace.

Current excitement: Flea Market/Yard Sales. Upcoming social events.

Current mood: Swell.

Current link: 73 Questions with Sarah Jessica Parker - I thought this was really cute and how could you seriously not like SJP after an interview like this and look at her houseeee.

Friday, February 21, 2014
When was the last time I did a current post? Seems like forever.

Current guilty pleasure: Melting snow. I honestly hate snow, I don't even find it pretty at this point, just annoying. Luckily and well, unluckily, I was sick when it snowed last week so I couldn't really go anywhere anyway but I hate being stuck in the house and not able to play outside because massive heaps of white water ice fall from the clouds. I can't wait to get out and ride my bike.

Current nail color: Hot mess by Rachel Designs and of course I mean my nails are a hot mess because I'm lazy and I also don't really care about doing my nails. I did have this purple sparkly combination going on my fingers that I had some "unicorn" name for but it has chipped off.

Current playlist:  (" Heather Mooney! Oh my god, you're exactly the same!") The Smithereens - Blood and Roses // Sisters of Mercy - Dominion/Mother Russia // Sisters of Mercy - Flood I // Richard Hawley - Baby You're my Light // Band of Horses - Our Swords // Devandra Banhart - Lover // The Breeders - Cannonball // The Handsome Family - Far from Any Road

Current drink: Crystal Light Strawberry Orange Banana. I was really sick of lemon water. My asthma has been bad so I've been avoiding alcohol but an orange muscat mouth meeting is in order because It's Friday, bitches! :Throws confetti: Gets irritated by Mess: Vacuums it up immediately!

Current food: Trader Joe's crumpets with a little butter and honey. Marry me, crumpet goddesses.

Current Favorite TV Show: True Detective! I'm obsessed, totally and utterly obsessed. Even Halo watches it, seriously, he was sitting on the couch watching the entire episode. Apparently Halo is a crime drama fan, he likes to watch the ID network as well. My kitty and I have so much in common. Besides my cats TV viewing choices, can we talk about how awesome Matthew McConaughey is on True Detective? He is honestly blowing me away every single week.

Current wish list: Bike Rides! Ashley Stewart High Waist Pencil Skirt in Pink / Fashion to Figure Elena Rose Top / Crosley Turnable in Red / Royal Velvet Damask Duvet in Red / Miz Mooz Heloise Shoes / Porcelain Cat Lamp / Doc Marten Spike Boots / Ashley Stewart Faux Leather Wool Trench / Ashley Stewart Green Pencil Skirt / Coffee Table with Storage / OPI - Red Hot Rio / Cadbury Buttons / Casual Plus Eyelash Top / We Love Colors Tights in Red & Black / Torrid Cat Ragalan Tee / Torrid One Piece Red

Current needs: Bike rides. Yes, I'm 10 years old, I desperately need my bike riding time.

Current triumphs: Uh...... can I get back to you on that?

Current bane of my existence: You said it Orange Kitty.

Current indulgence: Crumpets. Lemon Oreos!

Current excitement: True Detective on Sunday. As I've said, melting snow, if it snows again so help me. Beetlejuice 2 although I am a bit hesitant. The Sims 3, I'm back in obsession mode.

Current mood: Crumpety.

Current link:

Friday, January 31, 2014

I've been back from my trip to Manhattan (and Brooklyn) for a few days and I don't want to lie... it wasn't a resounding success. I hesitated on whether to admit my trip didn't go perfectly but I think most of us have had trips that didn't go quite as planned. Traveling can be stressful and it can be hard to not bring your stresses from home with you on a trip, especially when they are fresh in your memory. I had a setback the day I was scheduled to leave and I went back and forth that night on whether I should go or not but ultimately I decided to go. In the end I'm glad I went but I've learned a few valuable lessons for any future trips, like perhaps traveling to only warmer climates in the dead of Winter lol. It felt like it was -5degrees the first day I was there, my legs took hours to warm up. I also realized that I don't like sharing rooms with friends or family (Jason is different but he had to work and couldn't go). I'm the type of person who needs my alone time and that was almost impossible to manage on a tight budget and in a small hotel room. I also realized that I'm not the easiest person to travel with and I really would have been happiest if I had taken the trip alone. I've always been scared at the idea of taking a trip by myself but I know now that I would be more than fine on my own but anyway, I wanted to share some of the details and pictures from my trip.

The first day was spent briefly in Times Square and then over to see this gorgeous library (and to thaw my frozen appendages) at Jefferson Market. Followed by shopping on Bleecker Street where I bought candy, cupcakes, cds, toys, and lunch. Everyone was really friendly and accommodating at the various shops. 

It is weird to spend so much time wishing it was even closer to 30 degrees because the cold made it so I pretty much buried my head in my coat and rushed from place to place.

The second day was almost completely devoted to traveling to Brooklyn to see one of my favorite bands, Trust, perform. Seeing Trust was actually the reason I went to New York, I found out about the show only a month prior and was scrambling to get money together for it. Trust was awesome and did not disappoint at all, I only wish my pictures had turned out better, this was the best one. The funny thing too is that now that I've been home for a few days, they've announced more dates for their upcoming tour and will be in my area in April. Yes, I am going to that too.

I decided to take an earlier bus home on Saturday but had enough time to stop at a few places, including The Strand bookstore and Forbidden Planet! I highly recommend a visit if you find yourself in the area. Another few places I recommend are Books of Wonder, Amy's Bread, Generation Records, Rebel Rebel Records, and probably others I am forgetting.

I didn't take as many pictures as I had hoped I would and I didn't get to see all the places I wanted to see... can you believe I've still never set foot inside a New York museum or Central Park?! I might potentially go back for FFFWeek in June but time shall tell.


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